SternShowBlog.com

© 2009 SternShowBlog.com - TheHemiGirl.com

How’s that for a get! Ex-Miss Howard TV Melissa “Hemi Girl” Teixeira is the new Miss Stern Show Blog. And yes, I begged and groveled to get her. I do what it takes.

Melissa is an awesome catch, and horny. Telling me her wildest sexual experience was under the thighs–err, eyes–of the law. “Many moons ago I had sex on top of a police car, with a police officer,” she said. Now that’s better than giving $5 a month to your local municipality!

© 2009 SternShowBlog.com - TheHemiGirl.com

But Melissa is a lady of high morals. She’s not into anal, “Exit only!” Melissa only shaves sometimes, but has messed around with a chick. “Couple times,” says Melissa, “Nothing more then just kissing in a nightclub.” Hey, it still gave me a boner.

And Melissa is a big time Howard fan too, but Howard isn’t the only one on the show she’d fuck. “Oh boy, I am going to get in trouble for this answer,” Melissa warned, I’m stuck between Howard and Gange.”

Ugh! Then again, who can resist a balding fat guy who shaves his chest? Fail!

But Melissa loves her Howard. She’s been listening to the show since high school, and was thrilled to meet the king. She told me, “My favorite Stern moment of all time was when I got to shake his hand and take a picture with him. All thanks to Ronnie!”

Now not to be a downer, I also asked Melissa what she thinks about the Artie debacle. No surprise, she feels for our Baby Gorilla.

“When I got picked [to be Miss Howard TV], my brother-in-law sent me to New York City with Artie’s book to have him sign it,” she explained, “I had to make a trade off with Artie, if he signed my brother-in-law’s book, Artie got to smack my ass in return. I love Artie. I just hope that he gets well soon.” No doubt Artie signed the book.

© 2009 SternShowBlog.com - TheHemiGirl.com

As for being Miss Howard TV, Melissa loved every second of it. Telling me, “It was an awesome experience and I enjoyed meeting everyone and making new friends. I feel like a part of the Howard family now. Well, maybe like a distant cousin or something.”

And as for Melissa’s family’s reaction to her being name Miss Howard TV, they loved it, especially her brother-in-law who is a huge fan.

“I have done some risqué’ radio interviews before and they know how I present myself, so they kept the faith in me,” she said.

But her friends are still a little shocked, and they all ask the same question, “Is Howard nice?” And she always replies, “Howard is a peach!”

Nice! Melissa was definitely a shot of high-profile mojo for Stern Show Blog, but don’t be scared off. If you or anyone you know is a hot chick, just email me, and join the party. Hey now!