Tag Archive | "J.D."
Picture of JD on his date with Ashley Dupre – nerd versus chopsticks
Now that’s the face of a guy on his dream date! The photo is from Ashley Dupre’s Twitter, looks like they really did go to Nobu, but I don’t see any burn victims sitting around them. Ashley Twittered a lot during the date, so clearly she is taking the whole thing seriously. Run JD, run. It’s [...]
Continue reading...JD flies to Los Angeles to bang Ashely Dupre – TMZ wants in — UPDATE — JD is just a friend
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Poor JD got bombarded today. The opening salvo made fun of his bad—err, new—haircut. He looks like Louis Skolnick from Revenge of the Nerds. “The thing was you had good hair and you cut it all off,” Howard told JD, “I don’t get you! JD replied with something that sounded like, “It’s not that horrible. I’ve had [...]
Continue reading...JD is taking Ashley Dupre to “Banana Shpeel” – he puts condoms on his feet
Thursday, March 4, 2010
JD will not be directing Ashley Dupre’s music video. Instead, he’s taking the $5,000 and treating her to dinner and a nice hotel. She should be used to that! “I believe we have chosen to go out next week in the city,” says JD, “I think New York.” Where else, Lilliput? Howard was impressed. “I thought you were a [...]
Continue reading...David Letterman has “pussy powers” – Howard is “fuck room” less
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Howard talked about a Vanity Fair article praising David Letterman’s ability to seduce chicks. Dave has serious mojo. “I was madly in love with him at the time,” a former intern told the magazine, “I would have married him. He was hilarious.” Howard was impressed. Who wouldn’t be! “Once you get around him [Dave], you got to fuck him,” [...]
Continue reading...JD Polanski to “direct” Ashley Dupre’s “music” video
Monday, March 1, 2010
No man with $5,000 to spend has ever worked this hard to fuck a hooker—ever! Now the master plan is to direct a music video for her shitty music. “I believe we’ve agreed to do a music video,” says JD. But JD is still working on a “concept.” Let the ball busting commence! “Okay, in this scene you look [...]
Continue reading...JD needs a face transplant – no big money date with Ashley Dupre
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
JD is getting $5,000 from the new movie She’s Out of My League to take Ashley Dupre out on a dream date, but—surprise, surprise—he is totally clueless. “JD, what are you going to do with the $5,000, any thoughts?” Howard asked. Media Producer JD ran into the studio and replied, “We talked last night,” and, “She was [...]
Continue reading...JD gets $5,000 to take Ashley Dupre out – “I don’t know!”
Monday, February 22, 2010
Howard let the crew go to a screening of Shutter Island last week, so JD “wisely” took Ashley Dupre. Howard asked, “What was she wearing?” “Suit of armor!” Robin exclaimed. But JD replied, “I think like a sweater, her boots, and a pair of pants.” “Her boots.” Good thing, it’s pretty tacky to wear someone else’s boots on a [...]
Continue reading...No Ashley Dupre pussy for JD – mumble, mumble, mumble
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
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Looks like JD’s nerd love with ex-hooker Ashley Dupre has died on the vine. She’s not calling or texting him back. “I check it for everyone else,” Howard said as Ashley, “When you call I don’t check my voicemail.” Fred busted JD’s balls, saying that JD isn’t getting “LOL” or “LMAO” from Ashley. She’s sending him “GTFA,” or [...]
Continue reading...Sarah Silverman slims down – Jimmy is still Howard’s daddy
Thursday, February 4, 2010
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Sarah Silverman is looking good these days. Sarah told Howard she is down 11 pounds. “Your ass have never looked this tight,” said Howard. Sarah has a new man in her life. A comedy writer she met on Twitter. Howard thought that was weird. She should try dating a serious dude. But Sarah said, “What would I talk about [...]
Continue reading...JD leaves a voicemail for Ashley Dupre – he’s the direct opposite of smooth
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Da’ Badass is blowing his shot at ex-whore Ashley Dupre with a recent voicemail. Howard played JD’s dopey—err, dope—message on the air. “When it comes to this communicating with broads you get all tongue-tied,” Howard told JD, “When I listen to this, you’re fumfering too much.” His message is riddled with uh’s, ah’s, ugh’s, and miscellaneous JD trademark [...]
Continue reading...“Shitter Gate” is on – someone left doodie on the floor
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
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Robin told Howard someone took a shit on the floor in the guest bathroom; a tiny ball of feces. “Is it still around? Maybe we can do a DNA test,” asked Richard. “I would love to do a DNA test,” Howard insisted, “I would love to know who shit on the floor.” Too bad the turd had already [...]
Continue reading...JD is Scott the Engineer’s new boss – has the “power” to fire him
Monday, January 25, 2010
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“Media Producer” JD was slow with the clips this morning, specifically Conan’s last show diatribe. Howard blames JD’s happy pills. “JD went on this medication, he used to have everything for me,” Howard bitched. JD needs help. So Howard wants Scott the Engineer to help, since Scott does nothing all morning. “This Scott the Engineer’s got a cush [...]
Continue reading...Eric the Midget’s “American Idol” show is back – but if JD listens to it, he’s fired!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
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Eric the Midget wanted to know if anyone pulled clips from his American Idol show. No, nobody did. So “Media Producer” JD ran into the studio and mumbled, “You said you weren’t doing it, so I didn’t realize you were doing it, and now you are?” Too bad, because the show is good to go now, Eric [...]
Continue reading...JD and Ashley Dupre meet up – Ashley brings a can of mace
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
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JD put the smooth moves on Ashley Dupre during their hot chocolate date. JD pulled out the big guns. He wore khaki pants and ordered a macaroni appetizer. “Did you bring a condom just in case anything got heated up?” Howard asked. He didn’t, but Ashley brought something. Fred’s JD mumbled, “She had a can of mace [...]
Continue reading...JD and Ashley Dupre make hot chocolate love
Friday, January 15, 2010
Looks like JD is ready to go cougar hunting now. On her Twitter, call-girl turned “advice” columnist Ashley Dupre says she just got back from having hot chocolate Da’ Bad Ass. I just finished Hot Chocolate with JD. He is such a good person. I think he’s going to be one of my really good friends. He’s [...]
Continue reading...JD and Ashley Dupre, a match made in bizzaro heaven
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
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“We sort of made a preliminary date,” says JD; sounds like pre-promotion. Yesterday, show nerd JD gave ex-hooker Ashley Dupre his “media producer” business card, plus he wrote his cell phone number on it–lucky her. Howard played tape of the actual exchange. Surprisingly, it wasn’t a total train wreck. “Very smooth, it’s smooth for JD,” replied Howard, “It [...]
Continue reading...JD gives Ashley Dupre his “card” – says he’s a “media producer”
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
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“Did you get Ashley Dupre’s number?” Howard asked. Da’ Bad Ass replied, “I gave her my card.” “You have a card?” Howard replied. “That’s the funniest thing I heard all day!” JD said his card reads “media producer.” “You don’t really produce media, you just watch media, and produce it for me,” Howard joked. JD says someone mentioned the title [...]
Continue reading...Ashley Dupre does drugs, gets raped – won’t spread for $2 million
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
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“You look good,” Howard blurted out as Elliot Spitzer’s whore Ashley Dupre walked into the studio, “Looks are not your problem at all.” Ashley is built for fucking. She started having sex at 15, but now doesn’t think that’s a good idea. “I do think it’s too young, but it’s up to the parents to educate these [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: J.D. loves high-priced whores. Howard calls pro wrestling is gay porn. Robin’s hair doesn’t stop her from giving head.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
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Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! Howard had to take a piss, but decided to hold it until the next break. “I always pictured when we got to satellite, I could go get up and pee, and let there be dead air for three minutes,” Howard said. But [...]
Continue reading...Sex “mac’ hine” J.D. aims too high – he needs to stay within his “range”
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
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Howard played clips of J.D. on The Wrap-up Show talking about his delusional standards for girls. “I’m only attracted to who I’m attracted to,” J.D. mumbled. Gary told him he might be aiming too high. He needs to look in the mirror and be realistic, stay within his “range.” But Robin squawked, “Is Gary out of his mind! [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: Howard keeps Artie’s mic on. Gary gets rubber duckies for Christmas. Richard’s marriage is screwed.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
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Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! Howard doesn’t understand how rich kids, like the now dead Casey Johnson, grow up so fucked up. He guessed that, “Those rich kids don’t have to work towards anything, they kind of get lost in the abyss.” And Robin said, “One of [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: It’s really called Stern “Fag” Network. Ashley Dupre bails again. Gary spreads for “GameRoom Magazine.”
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! An emailer wrote in calling people on Stern “Fan” Network “zit-faced virgins” and saying, “These people are such nothings, they’re even jealous of J.D.” But best of all, he referred to Stern Fan Network as “Stern Fag Network.” Nice! Gary revealed celebrity super [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: Howard renames Lady Gaga. Uganda wants to kill all homosexuals. J.D. has “mesmerizing” hands.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
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Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! Howard likes Lady Gaga’s new song “Bad Romance,” especially the beginning when she mumbles gibberish. “It sounds like my Torah portion,” he said. But Howard did have one recommendation for Lady Gaga. She should call herself “Madam Poopie.” Awesome! Jimmy Kimmel stayed at [...]
Continue reading...Bubba the Love Sponge TNA wrestling superstar
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
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Bubba debuted on TNA wrestling last night. He’s the new “back stage guy.” So J.D. pulled some clips of it for Howard to play. Bubba was interviewing wrestlers that supposedly got “attacked” backstage, but no one knows who did it. And Bubba’s other mission was to sneak in friends of Hulk Hogan, since Hulk is Bubba’s BFF. But he [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: Howard has a movie festival. J.D. turns 30. Joey Boots screams “Baba Booey” everywhere!
Monday, January 4, 2010
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Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! Howard was busy watching movies all vacation. He loved Precious, Bad Lieutenant, The Burning Plain, Trucker, The Messenger, The Road, Brothers, Up, The Hurt Locker, The Proposal, G.I. Joe, and It’s Complicated. Fuck, that’s a lot of free time! Despite his gout, [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: Scott the Engineer is jealous. Artie is dishonest. “Avatar” is coming out.
Monday, December 14, 2009
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Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! Scott the Engineer was voted the most jealous. “He is. He’s the most jealous, he really is,” said Howard, “He’s angry with anyone who gets anything.” Tiger’s wife will allegedly divorce him after Christmas. Twilight star Robert Pattinson was 2009’s biggest actor. But Howard [...]
Continue reading...Quick bullets: J.D. is mumbling less. Howard is black. Gary won’t find a job.
Monday, December 14, 2009
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Real fast, here’s some more shit that went down on the show. Hey now! If Howard leaves, Gary may never work again. “How much you want to bet if Gary started looking for a job right now, he’d still be here in a year,” insisted Howard. On Zoloft, J.D. doesn’t stammer as much. Howard doesn’t like [...]
Continue reading...Everyone is getting fat – lots of “sacred cows” around — UPDATE –
Thursday, December 10, 2009
A guy called up and said he noticed on Howard TV everyone on the show is getting fat. Howard agreed. Artie, J.D., Richard, Jason, Brian Fallon, Jon Hein, and even Robin’s enema apprentice Tim Sabean is gaining weight. Tim admits he put on 10 pounds. He ate a lot on Thanksgiving. That’s why his hot pants are [...]
Continue reading...Rogue phone caller wakes Howard up, every night
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
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Some old bat has been calling Howard’s apartment every night, and waking him up out of a deep sleep. It’s making Beth mental. Howard said Beth ranted, “You call our place every day, don’t you know this is a wrong number!” But really fucking surprisingly, this doesn’t bother Howard. He just lets it go, so he has [...]
Continue reading...J.D. is back at work – but he’s trippin’ on Xanax
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
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J.D. made his “triumphant” return to the job today, looking and feeling better. Why? He was smiling, his hair was combed, and he was high on Xanax. “I think the Xanax might be the answer for you,” Howard said, “He’s euphoric!” J.D. explained, “It works ‘more faster,’ immediately.” It’s quicker than the Zoloft. “He’s as happy as a [...]
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- Jabba the Rush in serious condition – "rushed" to the hospital
- Artie tries to kill himself - our Artie is still the greatest
- Gabourey Sidibe is fat and needs help - major media backlash against Howard
- Big fatso Rush Limbaugh's shitty TV feed
- Howard rips Stern Fan Network, again
- The Who stink up the Super Bowl - halftime show from hell
- Management tells Artie to stay home - he might be in trouble -- UPDATE --
- Stern Show Blog is nearing 1,000 Twitter followers
- Artie's court date set for September 30th
- The "skinny" on Artie - it's a family matter
- illneverusethis: God damn Ashley Dupre is hot as hell. I'd hit it ...
- Balloon Knot: Lena, you're completely forgetting that Howard has...
- Ronald: 'Fuck that, for $15,000 I want a girl’s tongue bur...
- Gerald "Gerry" Pugliese: Ha! Actually its good practice. I have to remember...
- IloveBlackWang: "Her association with Oprah Winfrey will be an ass...
Saturday, March 13, 2010
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