Tag Archive | "Jason"
Benjy says “three-fifths of a person” isn’t in the constitution
“Arguing with Benjy, this is a guy who has night terrors,” barked Howard, “He dresses like a cat burglar.” Howard was referring to the shmata on Benjy’s head. “I want to look like a fat skier,” Fred’s Benjy joked. Benjy started arguing with Howard over the Scott DePace corporate money thing; somehow that matriculated into insisting blacks being [...]
Continue reading...Robin stiffs Leslie West on a guitar – never says thank you
Monday, January 25, 2010
Leslie West of Mountain—and long time friend of the show—dropped by today to scold Lady Quivers on her bad etiquette. “You donated a guitar to Robin’s Eretria charity,” Howard said to Leslie, “And I know it upset you that you never got a thank you.” “Thank you? Anything!” Leslie exclaimed. Turns out, Robin’s minions let her down. She [...]
Continue reading...Who would Robin fuck?
Monday, January 25, 2010
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Howard said he was up all night playing a game with Beth. He’d name two heinous staffers and Beth would have to pick who she would fuck. So he played it with Lady Quivers today. Scott the Engineer or Ronnie? Ronnie. Scott the Engineer or JD? Scott. Scott the Engineer or a zucchini? Zucchini. Medicated Pete or High [...]
Continue reading...Ralph is the tyrant of “Geek Time” – has a man crush on James Cameron
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Ralph isn’t gay, but he is for James Cameron, apparently. If Ralph can’t have him, no one can. A few weeks ago, last minute, James Cameron, director of Avatar, was available to be interviewed for Geek Time; Ralph and Jon Hein’s show. But Ralph couldn’t do it. “It’s the one day he’s got to be at your [...]
Continue reading...Jason body-blocks Lisa G. out of the staff photo
Thursday, January 14, 2010
“Lisa loves to be in front,” says Howard, referring to yesterday’s staff picture. “Lisa times it to get in here so she is in front.” But not this year! Jason “Jagunda” Kaplan threw his massive girth in front of Lisa right before the camera snapped, so you can barely see Lisa in the photo, just her [...]
Continue reading...Surprise call from Nick Scutari – the New Jersey weed senator
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
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Out of the green—err, blue—Sen. Nick Scutari called up. Nick sponsored the bill that aims to legalize medical marijuana in New Jersey. Nick is a Stern fan too. Hey Now! But he’s no pot head. “I’ve never smoked weed before in my life,” says Nick, “But I don’t have a problem with people who do.” Howard asked, “So what [...]
Continue reading...Hijinx at the Jon Hein Bar Mitzvah – Richard drinks, Tim eats, Sal fucks with Gary
Monday, January 11, 2010
Jon Hein’s daughter’s Bat Mitzvah was this weekend, and lots of the Stern crew attended, but not Howard. Everybody behaved—no Sal panty-sniffing—but plenty of shit still went down, like Sal fucking with Gary, turning off the televisions playing the Jets game. Howard explained, “Sal took it upon himself that whenever Gary was watching the game, Sal would [...]
Continue reading...Nobody likes Jason – disliked, annoying, douche bag
Monday, December 14, 2009
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The results are in. Wolfie’s staff survey revealed everyone hates Jason. “It’s very evident that Jason Kaplan is not well liked,” said Wolfie, “If this was the Academy Awards, Jason would be the movie Titanic, he swept all the major categories.” Jason drew the most votes for biggest ass kisser, gossip, and douche, and most disliked and [...]
Continue reading...Jason and Scott DePace are video game buddies – Howard wants to shoot them
Monday, December 14, 2009
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Mortal enemies Jason and Scott DePace admitted they can put their differences aside long enough to fucking shoot each other. Both Jason and Scott are obsessed with Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2. Jason could play all weekend, and Scott would rather log on than watch gay movies with his wife, like The Polar Express. Howard wants in [...]
Continue reading...Everyone is getting fat – lots of “sacred cows” around — UPDATE –
Thursday, December 10, 2009
A guy called up and said he noticed on Howard TV everyone on the show is getting fat. Howard agreed. Artie, J.D., Richard, Jason, Brian Fallon, Jon Hein, and even Robin’s enema apprentice Tim Sabean is gaining weight. Tim admits he put on 10 pounds. He ate a lot on Thanksgiving. That’s why his hot pants are [...]
Continue reading...Monday’s show overload! Howard is pissed at Rosa Parks. Ralph might be stealing the booze. Play whack pack songs on Coffee House.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
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A lot of shit happens on the show, you can’t cover everything! So each day, SternShowBlog breaks down all the cool stuff I missed from yesterday’s show. Hey now! Howard is pissed at Rosa Parks. She stole the idea not to move to the back of the bus from a woman named Claudette Colvin. Claudette did [...]
Continue reading...Yucko bullshits his stories – argues with everybody
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
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Yucko dropped by today. But Howard didn’t want him. Even Gary realized last night he had no idea why Yucko was coming on the show. Sometimes Yucko has good stories to tell, but when Will pre-interviews him, it turns out the stories aren’t true. So Howard called him on it. Yucko shot back, “We’ve all got bullshit [...]
Continue reading...Gary wants to punch Jason – Baba Booey is bored all the time
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
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Jason came into the studio to bash Gary about his book “reading” again. He insists Gary sounds “stupid” for saying he reads books, when he really just listens to audio books. Gary listens to them when he drives home from work. He gets bored. Gary warned Jason he’ll punch him if he keeps calling him stupid. So [...]
Continue reading...Yankees win the World Series – Jason and Artie have a gay hug — UPDATE –
Thursday, November 5, 2009
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Fred predicted it. The Yankees beat the Phillies in exactly six games. So Artie and Jason had a big hug this morning. Howard couldn’t believe it. “Their arms were barely big enough to hug each other,” he said, “These are two big men!” Howard asked if hugging like that is gay. It’s not. Then Howard asked young Will if [...]
Continue reading...Gary gives Ross tips about his breath – welcome to bizarro world!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
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Gary said he pulled Ross aside, and talked to him about his breath. On Monday, Sal accused Ross of having a sewer mouth. But Howard didn’t know why Gary was giving out mouth advice, saying, “It’s almost like Artie counseling D.J. AM.” Even hair beast Jason stomped into the studio, and confirmed Ross has a problem. “I knew [...]
Continue reading...Wednesday’s show overload! George and Brad win “The Newlywed Game.” Tourette’s intern Pete can’t get laid. Jackie Puppet calls Jackie’s Joke Hunt.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
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A lot of stuff happens on the Stern Show. It’s hard to cover it all! So every day SternShowBlog will sum up all the cool stuff I couldn’t get to from the previous day’s show. Here goes! George and Brad won The Newlywed Game on Tuesday. George was boasting about it, but he admitted the questions [...]
Continue reading...Thursday’s show overload! J.D. really is “Napoleon Dynamite.” Robin is “best dressed” of 2009. Boys’ Night Out is a disaster.
Friday, September 18, 2009
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A lot of stuff happens on the Stern Show. It’s hard to cover it all! So every day SternShowBlog will sum up all the cool stuff I couldn’t get to from the previous day’s show. Here goes! J.D. admitted he hates studio tours. He said he doesn’t know how to interact with people. It doesn’t help [...]
Continue reading...Where are the pictures of Beth?
Thursday, July 23, 2009
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Howard asked Jason why there weren’t any photos of Beth up on the website from her visit to the studio yesterday. Jason stammered and admitted he’d rather take pictures of guys in bras filled with potatoes, but Fred thought Jason was just too busy checking out J.D.’s butt. No worries, I got your back! That picture [...]
Continue reading...How many potatoes can Robin’s bra hold?
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Today, the Stern Show put Robin’s old 36 double-D bras to the test, stuffing them to capacity with potatoes. After being unable to stretch Robin’s boulder-holders around Jason’s fat hairy back, newly thinner Artie stepped up to the plate and strapped in. After Howard ranted about Howard TV taking home most of the potatoes, leaving the [...]
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- Jabba the Rush in serious condition – "rushed" to the hospital
- Artie tries to kill himself - our Artie is still the greatest
- Gabourey Sidibe is fat and needs help - major media backlash against Howard
- Big fatso Rush Limbaugh's shitty TV feed
- Howard rips Stern Fan Network, again
- The Who stink up the Super Bowl - halftime show from hell
- Picture: Stern fan Sandy catches JD and Ashley Dupre at Nobu
- Management tells Artie to stay home - he might be in trouble -- UPDATE --
- Stern Show Blog is nearing 1,000 Twitter followers
- Artie's court date set for September 30th
- www.nulifeonline.com: LOL.............nice try JD...
- Dave Salazar: Can't wait...
- John Foe: Sure is this Robin, she would follow Dr Drew. ...
- BrianS: I dig Asian chicks, especially Korean girls. JD sh...
- HStern: JD is the man. That prostitute would be lucky to g...
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
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